Even the most successful people have moments when they feel shy and uncomfortable.  For most of us, meeting new people is difficult, and making conversation with someone we’ve just met can feel like getting a tooth pulled.   The good news is you can overcome and control your shyness. Here are some strategies for becoming the life of the party—or at least not the wallflower:  

• Explore the causes. Shyness is usually caused by excessive self-consciousness, a negative self-image, or excessive preoccupation with yourself—or a combination of all three. When you’re feeling shy, analyze your thoughts and emotions to find out what’s holding you back. You’ll be better able to address the problem when you understand what’s behind it.

• Underline your own strengths. Instead of thinking about what you can’t do in social situations, remind yourself of what you’re good at. Most of us usually don’t have trouble talking about subjects where we feel confident and experienced. Focus on these areas instead of any flaws you think you may have.

• Focus on other people. Ask questions that let other people talk, and encourage them to open up and share their opinions. You’ll be less worried about saying something wrong, and you’ll probably find enough common ground on which to build a real conversation.

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